jae wrote: Now they're stacking them up making it feel like I need to see every one before I can see the next, and I realize I'm at least 3 movies behind. Guess I'll just wait until they're all out on *easily consumable media* before I bother.
I believe that is their "master plan", if you will.
Make every movie a prequel to the next, so that people won't dare miss any. DC tried the same, with Supes and Bats v Supes (seriously ... how could they fuck THAT one up?!). But DC weak, and Marvel strong. Because Marvel belongs to Disney, and if anyone knows how to milk every penny out of intellectual property while also keeping future options open, it's Disney, innit.
For me, most of the Marvel movies in recent years have been ... meh-tastic. At best. Age of Ultron
? Good grief. Thor: Ragnarok
The last good Marvel movie that comes to mind is Ant Man
, the >only< good DC movie since Superman Returns
was Wonder Woman
. Though they fucked up the ending of the latter. Just another "big evil villain who's big and evil because he's big and evil, in the dark, with flames". Seen way too much of those.
I fear that what had once been grandiose, rare, and geek-gastic, the comic book movie, has become a tired mass-market commodity.
They must attract such large crowds, they have to feed the mass market. And a lot of the escapism is lost, as it a lot of the interesting brain twisters and what have you.
Marvel could have made good if, in the latest Spider Man movie. Instead of "an kid with spider powers gets a suit from Tony Stark", they'd have brought back Toby Maguire. Retired superhero, teacher, and father of a young boy who is starting to develop his superpowers. That would have been just enormous.
But they didn't. They rebooted instead, striking two great movies from the Marvel canon (striking the third Maguire outing from the canon I wouldn't mind, not at all). Meh.
It's not just those two, DC and Marvel.
Any comic book movie these days. Valerian
. I had been waiting for a cinematic adaptation of that for approximately thirty. Fucking. Years. It was my introduction to sci-fi, when I was at least ten years too young to be exposed to a lot of the stuff in the comic books. When I heard Luc Besson would do it. The man who had made The Fifth Element
and had later complained that he hadn't been able to do nice effects like he'd wanted. I was cackling with delight.
I am half blind, there is literally no point in going to a movie theater for me. I'd just get out dizzy, with a sore neck, and still I'd have seen only half the movie. So I had to wait for the Blue Ray. Literally the first
Blue Ray I've ever bought. I even pre-ordered the sucker.
There was a bunch of great stuff in there, too. The whole market bit at the beginning, loved it.
Mass-market appeal, written on an organ-grinder, by as much appeal as it had. I could live with deviation from the comic book. I could even live with quite simply the worst
zero-g I've seen on screen in years (in the opening sequence). But ignoring some of the best beats from the comic, and producing a story that makes pretty much zero sense.
Just so that he can string together a bunch of fancy 3D effects.
Monsieur Besson is now on my shitlist. WAY up on my shitlist.
He had managed to make an entertaining movie out of Lucy
, which is seriously one of the worst premises, worst writing, and worst fight-sequences I can even recall off of the top of my head ... and yet it was fun to watch! And Valerian? Nope.REEEEAAALLLYYY
way, way up on my shitlist.
I think comic book movies need a boot up their ass at this point. Kevin Smith should maybe do one, and I'd know just which one. He genuinely loves the medium, anything he could do with the material would come from the heart, he doesn't want to be repetitive in his filmmaking (hence isn't making much anymore ... besides producing a bunch of stinkers and sinkers ...). And he'd be perfect for Nextwave: Agents of H.A.T.E.
. If you don't know it: imagine Deadpool, but with a superhero team, half of whom are badass women, and at least as effed up as the Deadpool comics.
Or Tarantino. When he's done with his Star Trek (wheeeee!!!!!), he MUST do a comic book movie! Maybe he should reboot Superman and try to make something worth watching out of it.
There is TONS of great material in comics they could put on the big screen. Even if they shit on the source material, they can make a brilliant film! I particularly have V for Vendetta
, because the central message of the comics is kicked overboard for pretty much the opposite moral lessen ... but they made a fucking. Great. Movie.
I haven't paid attention to comic books in about a decade. But even when I still did, there was tons of stuff, besides Nextwave, that is untapped.Transmetropolitan
should be an epic Netflix series. But pretty much anything else, could make ossum movies! If anyone wants to fuck over Alan Morre once more, why aren't they making a Tom Strong
movie?! Where is the cute movie about the cuddly, cuddly, lethal cyborg animals We3
Or the stuff I hear they're doing these days.
Iron Man is a young, black girl. So long as Tony Stark is in the background somewhere, that could even fit in with the modern Iron Man movie canon!
And Captain America is the head of fucking Hydra! That I'm almost tempted to try reading, because that is the fuckest. Uppest. Idea. Ever.
But it's fucking Disney. There's a reason Disneyification isn't an accolade most places are looking for.
Feck. Comic book movies. May just be. Just. "Product", from the sausage machine.
P.S.: No, I mean it, Superman Returns
was a great DC movie. A captacular Superman movie, absolutely. But do what I do.
Start the movie, and any time before the third act that the clown in blue comes on screen, fast forward to the next scene. Instead of a shitty superhero movie, enjoy a wacky caper-movie about criminal mastermind Lex Luthor and his remarkably inept crew as they try to make the big time! Hilarious!
If there were absolutely anything to be afraid of, don't you think I would have worn pants?
I said I have a big stick.