budgets suck

[Rench]

I can't imagine this is the first time I've griped about this, but Christ sometimes you just need to scream into the void.

Where does the money go? Anyone, anywhere, can you tell me where the fucking money goes? I've had an embarrassing amount of windfalls this year, and they're all completely fucking gone. I've got a budget which has taken a lot of arguments to work into mine and Mrs. Rench's habits, and it's fucking bulletproof. This much comes in, this much goes out by necessity, and this much is left over to work with. Not rocket science, provable in hard fucking numbers. And still, here I am, on the 30th/31st of any given month, and I feel like I need 4 baby aspirin dissolved in a whiskey neat while I wait for the ambulance to come check my heart rate.

Just...fuck.

As you were.

-Rench

[Jaeger]

It's true. There's never "enough," whatever the hell that means.

--Jaeger

[Zim]

Penny for your thoughts?

[DerGolgo]

If you have x of y, you'll end up using x of y, don't you.
It's the flipside of the problem where only having a hammer makes any problem look like a nail.
The only constructive suggestion I could make is going all economic for a while. Save every penny you can, avoid any unnecessary expense. Than go back to your regular budget, but now with maybe a month worth of disposable income as a cushion. Resist the temptation to dip in it, let it sooth your soul by it's sheer presence.

[Bo_9]

Yep, been trying to get a system that works for years. No luck yet. Luckily the job outruns the wife and kids expenses most months so far.
It's kind of scary when you realize you have no system and are just hoping the cash is there. Yeah, that's apparently how we been rollin' for the last 15 years.
Really just winging it.

I'm guessing if I'd had a budget for the last 15 years I could retire now. Gee, that'd be nice.

[12ci]

less is more.

we're actually doing OK since i was laid off again.

OTOH I REALLY NEED TO GET BACK TO WORK

[2XSL]

chicks waste money like nuts

[Bo_9]

I think the chicks thing is highly subjective. Before kids it was pretty even.

[GeekGrl]

chicks waste money like nuts

Granted there are almost no women that post on the board anymore, so you're likely not offending too many people with that insulting misogyny, but perhaps quips like that are part of why the once impressive number of female Ootmiks among the active ranks have diminished down to almost none.

[GeekGrl]

I can't imagine this is the first time I've griped about this, but Christ sometimes you just need to scream into the void.

Where does the money go? Anyone, anywhere, can you tell me where the fucking money goes? I've had an embarrassing amount of windfalls this year, and they're all completely fucking gone. I've got a budget which has taken a lot of arguments to work into mine and Mrs. Rench's habits, and it's fucking bulletproof. This much comes in, this much goes out by necessity, and this much is left over to work with. Not rocket science, provable in hard fucking numbers. And still, here I am, on the 30th/31st of any given month, and I feel like I need 4 baby aspirin dissolved in a whiskey neat while I wait for the ambulance to come check my heart rate.

Just...fuck.

As you were.

-Rench

Oh quit your fecking whingeing.

Where does the money go? You bought a Ural and sidecar recently, didn't you? A wholly unnecessary expensive purchase strictly for your own enjoyment. Not too long ago you started a thread about how easily you could afford a bigger, more expensive house. You were taking bagpipe lessons --- bagpipe lessons? WHERE DOES THE MONEY GO? You know exactly where it has gone. And from your posts, its largely to things that YOU want (not your family -- YOU), and maybe a few very small extra expenses for your kids (is the one still doing scouting?)

Considering the number of people on this board (and beyond) who ACTUALLY have difficulty making ends meet, who maybe can't afford to eat consistently, can't make rent, or worry about medical bills, or how to care for aging parents, or, or, or ... its pretty damn insulting and insensitive of you to ask WHERE DOES THE MONEY GO.

Sure, ask the board "how do you stick to a budget"? or even bitch that you can't stick to a budget, but your disingenuous "rant" asking "where does the money go" is, frankly, boorish. Go blow your bagpipe while I'm off cringing that I can't afford a pair of summer sandals for my kid.

[DerGolgo]

Now, let's be fair.
Brother rench doesn't buy a new Ural EVERY month, nor did he actually buy that house.
He's had a bad experience, he has some emotional distress about his budget. That other people may have, rationally speaking, more financial worries than him does not affect how much he's actually worrying.
Telling people to suck it up an be happy they're not in as bad a situation as someone else has never impressed me as particularly helpful, I'm sorry. It may be, rationally, appropriate, but it's not helpful. Being right is not as satisfying as helping out a brother, I find.
Not helping him out with money, not when he is, rationally, financially sorted for now.
But helping him out with some helpful suggestions, maybe.


So, Rench, you're distressed about how little money is left over at the end of the month. Even though you are, thus far, not running at a deficit, you'd rather not see quite that much money going out. That's is a commendable attitude, the attitude of someone thinking about tomorrow, not just today, about the people who depend on 'em. Their family.
So, your and your family's behavior is what controls the speed at which money goes out. If you want to change how much money goes out in a month, that's what you have to address, brother. You don't have to make hard choices or practice self denial. You might, but maybe, you don't. After all, you're not running at a deficit, so no one is forcing you to make changes. Rather, you want to make them, proactively. You have a choice. Enjoy that!
Maybe look at little things where economies can be made. Make a rule not to spend more than x for y, where you've got the choice. Work out how much of your money goes to more or less frivolous expenses, and how much goes to necessities, so as to get an idea how much you need vs. how much you want.
Most of all, keep in mind that you're, apparently, in a financial position where you won't have to worry, so that if you do this, it's at your own digression, rather than under coercion.

Note, please, that I had nothing constructive to offer before because, then, I was sober. Now, I'm phenomenally inebriated. Totally blitzed, blasted, bended and quite blotto. Also, rather drunk. Which is one of the more sensible states to consider money worries, IMHO.

[Bigshankhank]

Note, please, that I had nothing constructive to offer before because, then, I was sober. Now, I'm phenomenally inebriated. Totally blitzed, blasted, bended and quite blotto. Also, rather drunk. Which is one of the more sensible states to consider money worries, IMHO.

I knew there was some reason I voted for Herr DerGolgo as interim Grand Chancellor.

[Bigshankhank]

Honestly Renchlick, you've got it made. Not to go quite as far as GeekGrl in telling you to pipe down about your financial woes, but you, judging by what you have posted in the past few years have done fairly well, I'd hazard to say better than a lot of families. I can commiserate that it sucks to feel like for all of your (and your spouse's) efforts, the pay doesn't seem commensurate with the work, but the wolves are at bay. I am sure that your diligence and financial scrutiny has allowed you to weather this recent financial storm, but some of us have not been as lucky despite our own diligence and hard work and are just now finally digging ourselves out of the sinkhole we found ourselves in, several states away from the home where we want to be. In many cases, and I would hazard to guess that GeekGrl is a good example, apparently the storm hasn't passed.
GGrl, to everyone their situation is the most important and crucial one that they need to be concerned with. Having met Rench and his wife, and interacted with him on this and another board, I feel safe in defending him that he was not intentionally boorish or callous to what you or anyone else may still be suffering through financially. Nor was he or I for that matter diminishing your problems.
We are all frustrated with our finances, if we weren't we would have been invited to the gold membership UTMC board that Beemer Dan, Blackjoe and Rat:Bike:Madness started up to get away from the rest of us trash.

[GeekGrl]

Now, let's be fair.
Brother rench doesn't buy a new Ural EVERY month, nor did he actually buy that house.
He's had a bad experience, he has some emotional distress about his budget. That other people may have, rationally speaking, more financial worries than him does not affect how much he's actually worrying.
Telling people to suck it up an be happy they're not in as bad a situation as someone else has never impressed me as particularly helpful, I'm sorry. It may be, rationally, appropriate, but it's not helpful. Being right is not as satisfying as helping out a brother, I find.
Not helping him out with money, not when he is, rationally, financially sorted for now.
But helping him out with some helpful suggestions, maybe.

I didn't tell him to suck it up. I told him that being disingenuous about where his money goes is boorish and insulting.

It's one thing asking for advice about how to stick to a budget, or even bitching that he can't stick to a budget. What got the burr under my skin was the claim that he DOESN'T KNOW where his money has gone, with the added implication that he's having difficulty "making ends meet" in a ploy for sympathetic back-pounding that "it'll be okay, brotha, we know how you feel -- not being able to buy a new motorcycle Every Month sucks!"

Life is tough for everyone in different ways, and yeah, here's as good a place as any for some therapeutic venting and ranting. Generally speaking, folks are likely to empathize with your plight, be it temporary or long-term, and you might even get some good advice or at least some bitter-pill-mitigating sympathy. Have at it -- its what can make this board a place we want to hang out at.

But, if you're going to "vent" about "where does the money go" when you've already talked up how well you're doing elsewhere on the board, then I'm going to call out that shit. I'd do the same to any other friend of mine who was bitching about the cost of caviar to the people at the food bank.

[Jaeger]

But, if you're going to "vent" about "where does the money go" when you've already talked up how well you're doing elsewhere on the board, then I'm going to call out that shit. I'd do the same to any other friend of mine who was bitching about the cost of caviar to the people at the food bank.

He did say that he runs a budget and knows what goes in and what goes out. That's arithmetic. He's a bright enough guy, I'd wager he knows precisely where it goes -- exactly as you say. Fucker has more bikes than I do.

I know exactly what he means. I pull a good salary but still whine about my lack of play money. It's aggravating when you're supposedly "making it" and you're STILL fuckin' strapped.

Please for to note that the UTMC is (at least hypothetically) a message board devoted to motorcycles. Any financial woe may be legally bemoaned if it detracts from the pursuit of anything on 2-wheels.*



Like I said, it's never "enough," whatever that means.

--Jaeger

*Then again, the Ural is 3 wheeled, so that might be a viable case...

[DerGolgo]

I didn't tell him to suck it up. I told him that being disingenuous about where his money goes is boorish and insulting.

You did tell him to stop "whingeing" which, to me, read like an instruction to do what, in my understanding, is also referred to as "suck it up". I apologize if I misinterpreted that.

***EDIT***
Pompous and presumptuous crap has been removed.
***EDIT***

I didn't get the impression brother Rench was angling for sympathy. Nor for hard-life kudos or whatnot.
Reads to me like a man who got worried and angry about something and shared that with his buddies, as people do.

[Rench]

*edit*

I've been asked to reword my statement here by people whom I respect. I respect them further because there was no mention of "retraction," just re-wording. I imagine the only person that needed to read the original words has read them by now anyway.

I do consider this place to be a second home of sorts, and certainly a stockpile of friends who I share my joys and accomplishments as well as my stressors when they come up. Friends don't blindly challenge or bring my parenting into things, so I reacted, I maintain, appropriately.

I'm not trying to hide my disdain or response, and will gladly discuss it with anyone who wants to ask, with likely additional colorful metaphors which I chose to not use here. Until then, while the original sentiment and wording still stands, let's just say "Geekgrl, don't bring my kids into stuff. Not cool. Bad Geekgrl, bad!"



-Rench

[Bigshankhank]

[DerGolgo]

[media]http://youtu.be/6oyxLFD2IIw?t=8s[/media]

[red]

chicks waste money like nuts

Granted there are almost no women that post on the board anymore, so you're likely not offending too many people with that insulting misogyny, but perhaps quips like that are part of why the once impressive number of female Ootmiks among the active ranks have diminished down to almost none.

I must be a "chick" because I was the money waster, not RedQueen.

Before I got married, I had no issue with ignoring debt and the resulting collection calls. After I finally paid everything off, we ended up racking up some serious debt, part of it by helping out a family member. I got really fucking stressed over all of it. Ever bill that appeared in the mailbox would add more drops to my bucket of stress. Eventually, even the cost of riding became a point of stress. Before having the baby, I was completely stressed out trying to finish the remodel I started a few years ago, prepare for the coming increase in expenses and buy all the baby necessities.

Finally, I couldn't carry that fucking bucket of stress any longer, so I put it down. I still dip in and carry some around once in a while but that bucket almost cost me my marriage and in turn, my daugher.

Since having the Wee-One and being down to one income, we've had to quickly change our financial tune. I had to really look at where our money went, sometimes shit just doesn't get paid and sometimes you gotta sell some crap to make ends meet. But at the end of the day, as long as you and the family are healthy, have food in your bellies, a roof over your head, that's all that really matters.

[Bigshankhank]

I must be a "chick" because I was the money waster, not RedQueen.

Before I got married, I had no issue with ignoring debt and the resulting collection calls. After I finally paid everything off, we ended up racking up some serious debt, part of it by helping out a family member. I got really fucking stressed over all of it. Ever bill that appeared in the mailbox would add more drops to my bucket of stress. Eventually, even the cost of riding became a point of stress. Before having the baby, I was completely stressed out trying to finish the remodel I started a few years ago, prepare for the coming increase in expenses and buy all the baby necessities.

Finally, I couldn't carry that fucking bucket of stress any longer, so I put it down. I still dip in and carry some around once in a while but that bucket almost cost me my marriage and in turn, my daugher.

Since having the Wee-One and being down to one income, we've had to quickly change our financial tune. I had to really look at where our money went, sometimes shit just doesn't get paid and sometimes you gotta sell some crap to make ends meet. But at the end of the day, as long as you and the family are healthy, have food in your bellies, a roof over your head, that's all that really matters.

Here here, I tried to do the "Im the guy, I should be taking care of the money" thing and similar to you it was costing me my marriage. Finally I handed it off to my wife and we have been running down our debts ever since. So no misogyny or hate-speech from me, my wife is like a red headed Jew when it comes to money.

[Toonce(s)]

So no misogyny or hate-speech from me, my wife is like a red headed Jew when it comes to money.

My sides....

[wyckedsin]

ayup...wife and I have a budget. WE have had a budget for the last couple of years. We know the 'SET' bills. We know we have $X as disposable. WE also learned that to keep on budget, we needed to figure out how to double the disposable cash each month. You would think that 2 people that had a $1500 a month drinking habit, would have $1500 in disposable income every month now that they quit drinking...

Granted, /our/ "Unforeseen" did not happen in small denominations. Budgeting to go to CA once a month, and ending up there every weekend took us 4 months to recover, meanwhile, we were still going to CA twice a month instead of once as we had budgeted. Once we got that bit under our belt, we really got serious about "WTF?Where did it go?"

It turned out to be little shit. The little nickel and dime crap we don't think about. We literally stopped carrying cash. We made a rule that if it cost less than $5 we couldn't buy it by itself. IE: If I went to buy a soda at the store, I couldn't buy it because it was less than $5. Instead I would wait the extra 10 mins to get home. Stoopid shit like that.

How is this working out for us you ask? I have a new 1911 in 10mm, and the wife took the next step in the upgrade tiers for her wedding ring. We also took another 25% off our disposable and put it into my 401K each month.

[stiles]

The little stuff really does add up. When I worked in NYC I packed my lunch (10 bucks per day for soda and deli sandwich) , didn't smoke (ciggies were 8 bucks a pack or so), didn't go drinking on the weekends (easily 100 per) and stopped buying a coffee and donut every morning (2 bucks per day).

All that added up equals about 200 bucks a week in after tax money, or 800 per month, or 9600 bucks per year - easily enough to buy a new 1098 every two years... and I did buy a new 07 1098 back in the day, from my dealership, precisely that way. My co-workers thought I was nuts.

[12ci]

just saw this:

Don’t create a budget — and 12 other financial tips to live by

I’m in a crabby mood. Why not spread the joy around? Welcome to today’s deliberately inflammatory column. Here are 13 of my firmly held financial beliefs:

{deletia}

8. Don’t budget. It’s a tedious exercise favored by nerdy individuals. Instead, make sure you save enough every month. Do that, and there is no need to budget.

full story HERE

[Sisyphus]

I don't have a budget, really. I just assume I'm going to be broke at the end of the month, so if I have $150 in the checking account on the 30th, I'm happy. I've also long ago abdicated my bookeeping (household) to my wife, who does a much better job.

I still run the books for the business, which is really just a glorified savings account for the household. Funny I just saw this post of Rench's, because I was wondering the exact same thing after I ran a report this morning to see how we've done compared to this point in time in 2013. Company is ahead by a whopping $315 compared to last year's $15,000. Sadly, the report shows EXACTLY where all the money went.

[Bo_9]

I just looked at the Small excerpt from the article 12ci posted above. (Didn't actually read the article) It seems like my current budgeting method. Simply "make sure there is enough money". We've been running like that since shortly before my dad's cancer diagnosis over six years ago. Still not sure how we pull it off but every month things get paid. Saving expands and contracts to make that happen. But we still manage to make sure our pre-teen kids are in whatever sports and activities they want and do weekend trips often. Small diversions do wonders. For instance this weekend we went to Arkansas to pick up a parts bike (MatPoc I'll ping you once I have the stuff sorted), threw the kids in the hotel pool and took them on an awesome cave tour at War Eagle Cavern. Current issue is that I'm apparently the only person at work that can handle certain things. That translates into being on call 24/7/365. I now dread hearing my phone announce that I have email or a call from anyone without an assigned ring. To the point of panic at times demanding medication or self medication depending on location. That is the current price I pay to be sure the demand for cashflow is met. Current opinion is an actual budget may point out where we can accept a drop in that cashflow and reduce the stress level, only trouble is the hours aren't necessarily dictated by the need for cashflow, but the needs of the company.
Sorry kind of pseudo-venting (weakly) in this thread.

[guitargeek]

What's a budget?