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this will zero the unread anything for you, so you can strive forth into the exciting world of the new cookie thing.
Because the board got shutdown again because of a load of database, I had to fettle with the settings again.
As part of that, the server no longer stores what topics you have or haven't read.
IT IS STILL RECORDED!
But now, that information lives in a delicious cookie, rather than the forum database.
Upside: this reduces the load of database.
Downside: if you use multiple devices to access the board, you won't always have that information cookie. But the New Posts feature should take care of that.
PLEASE NOTIFY THE ADMINISTERRERRERR ABOUT ANY PROBLEMS!
2024 LOGIN/Posting ISSUES
Click if you have a problem.
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If you cannot Debauch because you get an IP blacklist error, try Debauching again time. It may work immediately, it may take a few attempts. It will work eventually, I don't think I had to click debauch more than three times. Someone is overzealous at our hosting company, but only on the first couple of attempts.
If you have problems logging in, posting, or doing anything else, please get in touch.
You know the email (if you don't, see in the registration info below), you know where to find the Administerrerrerr on the Midget Circus.
Some unpleasant miscreant was firing incessant database queries at our server, which forced the Legal Department of our hosting company, via their Abuse subdivision, to shut us down. No I have none.
All I can do it button the hatches, and tighten up a few things. Such as time limits on how long you may take to compose a post and hit Debauch! As of 24/01/10, I've set that at 30 minutes for now.
To restrict further overloads, any unregistered users had to be locked out.
How do we know who is or isn't an unregistered user?
By forcing anyone who wants in to Log In.
Is that annoying?
Yes. But there's only so much the Administerrerrerr can do to keep this place running.
Again, if you have any problems: get in touch.
REGISTRATION! NEW USERS!
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Please drop our fearless Administerrerrerr a line.
Tell him who you are, that you wish to join, and what you wish your username to be. The Administerrerrerr will get back to you. If you're human, and you're not a damn spammer, expect a reply within 24 hoursish. Usually quicker, rarely slower.
Unfortunately, the Contact Form is being a total primadonna right now, so please send an email to the obvious address.
Posting this address in clear text is just the "on" switch for spambots, but here is a hint.
Option the Second:
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Join up there, or just drop the modmins a message. They will pass any request on to the Administerrerrerr for this place.
How to deal with terminally ill friends?
-
rc26
- The Devil's Banana
- Location: Va.
How to deal with terminally ill friends?
I know 3 people who are battling cancer right now. 1 is stage 4, his prognosis doesn't look good. The other 2 are early in treatment stages. I want to help them in some way, but don't what to say to someone who is terminal. I'm at a loss, never been through that before. Wow.
"I reject your reality and substitute my own" - Stole it.
-
Bo_9
- Ayatollah of Mayhem
- Location: Filthy little worn-out, broken down, see through soul.
Re: How to deal with terminally ill friends?
That is a rough one that I've only experienced with my dad, not friends.
I'd say be there if you need them. Offer up rides to/from treatments if that is an issue. Just hang out and chat, until dad was on heavy pain meds toward the end he was going stir-crazy and having people around all the time seemed to help a lot. If you are able perhaps ask if there is anything they need help making arrangements for, this depends greatly on how close of a friend you are.
I'd say be there if you need them. Offer up rides to/from treatments if that is an issue. Just hang out and chat, until dad was on heavy pain meds toward the end he was going stir-crazy and having people around all the time seemed to help a lot. If you are able perhaps ask if there is anything they need help making arrangements for, this depends greatly on how close of a friend you are.
When an old man dies a library burns...
"Every accident involving machinery begins with a single defect. Never forget that defect can be between your ears." - E.J. Potter
"I feel like I'm in "my little pony" HELL!!!!" -Goose
"Well, he never ever smiled, but he always seemed pleased."
"keep about your wits, Know yourself and who you came in with"
"Every accident involving machinery begins with a single defect. Never forget that defect can be between your ears." - E.J. Potter
"I feel like I'm in "my little pony" HELL!!!!" -Goose
"Well, he never ever smiled, but he always seemed pleased."
"keep about your wits, Know yourself and who you came in with"
-
guitargeek
- Master Metric Necromancer
- Location: East Goatfuck, Oklahoma
- Contact:
Re: How to deal with terminally ill friends?
Can't go wrong with weed...
Elitist, arrogant, intolerant, self-absorbed.
Midliferider wrote:Wish I could wipe this shit off my shoes but it's everywhere I walk. Dang.
Pattio wrote:Never forget, as you enjoy the high road of tolerance, that it is those of us doing the hard work of intolerance who make it possible for you to shine.
xtian wrote:Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken
-
Jaeger
- Baron von Scrapple
- Location: NoVA
- Contact:
Re: How to deal with terminally ill friends?
+1 to both Bo and GG.
Sounds like they don't have time to dick around with formalities. I'd be straightforward about it and tell 'em "Look, I don't know what you need. You tell me. What can I do?"
--Jaeger
Sounds like they don't have time to dick around with formalities. I'd be straightforward about it and tell 'em "Look, I don't know what you need. You tell me. What can I do?"
--Jaeger
<<NEUTIQUAM ERRO>>Bigshankhank wrote:The world is a fucking wreck, but there is still sunshine in some places. Go outside and look for it.
2018 Indian Scout -- "Lilah"
-
red
- Yap. Doomed for all eternity.
- Location: Indy
- Contact:
Re: How to deal with terminally ill friends?
Jaeger is absolutely right. Time maybe short, so don't waste it walking on eggshells. My friend Mike appreciated the direct honesty like that.Jaeger wrote:+1 to both Bo and GG.
Sounds like they don't have time to dick around with formalities. I'd be straightforward about it and tell 'em "Look, I don't know what you need. You tell me. What can I do?"
--Jaeger
Proud Survivor From Thread Hole 64 Campaign
1987 CBR600F Hurricane Sprawl Bike
-=High Tech / Low Life=-
1987 CBR600F Hurricane Sprawl Bike
-=High Tech / Low Life=-
-
rc26
- The Devil's Banana
- Location: Va.
Re: How to deal with terminally ill friends?
Thanks. All good advice. I like the idea of being straightforward, but try not to be a downer. Positive waves, baby.
"I reject your reality and substitute my own" - Stole it.
-
guitargeek
- Master Metric Necromancer
- Location: East Goatfuck, Oklahoma
- Contact:
Re: How to deal with terminally ill friends?
Life is short, let's party.
Elitist, arrogant, intolerant, self-absorbed.
Midliferider wrote:Wish I could wipe this shit off my shoes but it's everywhere I walk. Dang.
Pattio wrote:Never forget, as you enjoy the high road of tolerance, that it is those of us doing the hard work of intolerance who make it possible for you to shine.
xtian wrote:Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken
-
Toonce(s)
- Asshat Spambot
- Location: south of cheese
Re: How to deal with terminally ill friends?
Ditto on the be-there-to-soothe-stir-crazy advice. Sometimes a person dealing with ... just wants to be around other people so they don't have to only listen to themselves talk and start to question their sanity. Naturally if someone wants to be left alone honor that as well.
Last edited by Toonce(s) on Fri May 01, 2015 10:56 am, edited 3 times in total.
It's a stack of fuck-shit on top of itself, Ninja.
-
guitargeek
- Master Metric Necromancer
- Location: East Goatfuck, Oklahoma
- Contact:
Re: How to deal with terminally ill friends?
Narrator: Oh, yeah, Chloe... Chloe looked the way Meryl Streep's skeleton would look if you made it smile and walk around the party being extra nice to everybody.
Chloe: Well, I'm still here. But I don't know for how long. That's as much certainty as anyone can give me. But I've got some good news: I no longer have any fear of death. But... I am in a pretty lonely place. No one will have sex with me. I'm so close to the end, and all I want is to get laid for the last time. I have pornographic movies in my apartment, and lubricants, and amyl nitrite...
[the group leader takes the mic]
Group Leader: Thank you, Chloe... everyone, let's thank Chloe.
Chloe: Well, I'm still here. But I don't know for how long. That's as much certainty as anyone can give me. But I've got some good news: I no longer have any fear of death. But... I am in a pretty lonely place. No one will have sex with me. I'm so close to the end, and all I want is to get laid for the last time. I have pornographic movies in my apartment, and lubricants, and amyl nitrite...
[the group leader takes the mic]
Group Leader: Thank you, Chloe... everyone, let's thank Chloe.
Elitist, arrogant, intolerant, self-absorbed.
Midliferider wrote:Wish I could wipe this shit off my shoes but it's everywhere I walk. Dang.
Pattio wrote:Never forget, as you enjoy the high road of tolerance, that it is those of us doing the hard work of intolerance who make it possible for you to shine.
xtian wrote:Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken
-
DerGolgo
- Zaphod's Zeitgeist
- Location: Potato
Re: How to deal with terminally ill friends?
Be there. Keep 'em company. Make sure they know you're there because you want to spend time with them, not just because of their illness.
Maybe try and give them a sense of normalcy here and there. Don't be tempted to use kid gloves in all situations.
Depending on how close you are to them.
Organizing something special (seeing the upcoming movie they wanna see but might never get the chance to because of the time till release, watching the sportsteam sports train, surprise trip to band x's concert) might bring them some welcome distraction and happiness, and the comfort to know someone cares enough about them to go to such lengths to organize that.
Apart from that. Getting someone stoned and laid sounds reasonable, yeah.
Maybe try and give them a sense of normalcy here and there. Don't be tempted to use kid gloves in all situations.
Depending on how close you are to them.
Organizing something special (seeing the upcoming movie they wanna see but might never get the chance to because of the time till release, watching the sportsteam sports train, surprise trip to band x's concert) might bring them some welcome distraction and happiness, and the comfort to know someone cares enough about them to go to such lengths to organize that.
Apart from that. Getting someone stoned and laid sounds reasonable, yeah.
If there were absolutely anything to be afraid of, don't you think I would have worn pants?
I said I have a big stick.
I said I have a big stick.
-
Bo_9
- Ayatollah of Mayhem
- Location: Filthy little worn-out, broken down, see through soul.
Re: How to deal with terminally ill friends?
Oh, and don't be surprised if they sometimes blurt out things awkward and/or inappropriate during the normal pauses in conversation.
i found that dad would sometimes use the pause to broach odd subjects.
i found that dad would sometimes use the pause to broach odd subjects.
When an old man dies a library burns...
"Every accident involving machinery begins with a single defect. Never forget that defect can be between your ears." - E.J. Potter
"I feel like I'm in "my little pony" HELL!!!!" -Goose
"Well, he never ever smiled, but he always seemed pleased."
"keep about your wits, Know yourself and who you came in with"
"Every accident involving machinery begins with a single defect. Never forget that defect can be between your ears." - E.J. Potter
"I feel like I'm in "my little pony" HELL!!!!" -Goose
"Well, he never ever smiled, but he always seemed pleased."
"keep about your wits, Know yourself and who you came in with"
-
Toonce(s)
- Asshat Spambot
- Location: south of cheese
Re: How to deal with terminally ill friends?
Sounds like a typical UTMC gathering.Bo_9 wrote:Oh, and don't be surprised if they sometimes blurt out things awkward and/or inappropriate during the normal pauses in conversation.
i found that dad would sometimes use the pause to broach odd subjects.
It's a stack of fuck-shit on top of itself, Ninja.
-
Bo_9
- Ayatollah of Mayhem
- Location: Filthy little worn-out, broken down, see through soul.
Re: How to deal with terminally ill friends?
Exactly!Toonce(s) wrote:Sounds like a typical UTMC gathering.Bo_9 wrote:Oh, and don't be surprised if they sometimes blurt out things awkward and/or inappropriate during the normal pauses in conversation.
i found that dad would sometimes use the pause to broach odd subjects.
But more personal and dire...
Also, if you offer to take care of something for them DO IT IMMEDIATELY and without hesitation.
When an old man dies a library burns...
"Every accident involving machinery begins with a single defect. Never forget that defect can be between your ears." - E.J. Potter
"I feel like I'm in "my little pony" HELL!!!!" -Goose
"Well, he never ever smiled, but he always seemed pleased."
"keep about your wits, Know yourself and who you came in with"
"Every accident involving machinery begins with a single defect. Never forget that defect can be between your ears." - E.J. Potter
"I feel like I'm in "my little pony" HELL!!!!" -Goose
"Well, he never ever smiled, but he always seemed pleased."
"keep about your wits, Know yourself and who you came in with"
-
wyckedsin
- Barista of Doom
- Location: exploring the rabbit hole looking for Alice...
Re: How to deal with terminally ill friends?
Keep treating them as a person and not an illness. It doesn't sound like you are, but someone else who reads this may not realize they are. Be cognisent of their limits but don't hold back because of the limits. Think up ways to incorporate the limits into your activities. Take them to a zoo, but keep in mind, they may need way more breaks so be cool with them. Ask them what their bucket list is and see if you can find something on it that you can make happen. Don't be afraid to reach out to others to help with that bucket list. I am not saying make everything happen or something major, but everyone has a small thing on their list that they just never got the chance to do that you moght be able to make happen. A friend of mine wanted to fly in a hot air balloon. I reached out to some local companies and one offered to let them fly for half price, so I got some other friends together and we came up with the cost for her. We paid for her and her sister to go. Not one of us who paid went. We let it be theirs, but when she passed, her sister made sure we knew how much it meant that we let it be "hers" and not "ours with her along" if you get my meaning.
Sanity has left the building