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God dammit

A forum for the off topic stuff. Everything from religion to philosophy to sex to humor (see why it used to be called Buggery?). All manner of rude psychological abuse is welcome and encouraged.
Post Reply
Zer0
Professor of Poop
Location: Smoggy Valley--east of Smog City

God dammit

Post by Zer0 » Tue Jan 22, 2013 3:32 pm

All you pudpulllers might be wondering why my recent postings arre becoming more vitriolic. Both bikes are down and this is the eighth day I've had to drive to work.

The Sporty's been stuck in 2nd ggear and I haven't had the tiime to loook into it. And now the Beemer's clutch went out, and all the parts and all won't be in tilll later this week--meaning I'm driving to work for a total of two plus consecutive weeks at least.

FUCK!

So if I've offended anyone's delicate sensibilities, I have some simple advice for you: now's an outstanding time to unwad your panties and get over it.


'74 R90/6--Thor
'05 Sportster 1200--FrankenRat
My boy D when he was 4 wrote:Bones aren't important--we like motorcycles.
High Kommand wrote:That's the problem with giving a bike a girl's name. Too much temptation to lay it down to examine the undercarriage...

User avatar
MATPOC
The Unreasonable Ukranian
Location: Providence, RI

Re: God dammit

Post by MATPOC » Tue Jan 22, 2013 4:22 pm

FUCK YOU!

It's snowing here, have not had a proper ride in over a week, and before that it was a WHOLE MONTH!

so stop whining and get wrenching, can't be that hard to fix the HD, you got a hammer, right?

User avatar
Bigshankhank
Fully Autonomous Cock-Puncher
Location: Exiled to Living in a Van Down By The River
Contact:

Re: God dammit

Post by Bigshankhank » Tue Jan 22, 2013 4:46 pm

I ain't got no bike, so quitcherbitchen
It's time for Humankind to ditch the imaginary friends of our species' childhood and grow the fuck up.
-Davros

"Lasse mich deine Seele dem Herrscher der Finsternis opfern"

Let me sacrifice your soul to the ruler of darkness

Always carry a bottle of whiskey when you travel in case of a snakebite. Futhermore, always carry a small snake.

Zer0
Professor of Poop
Location: Smoggy Valley--east of Smog City

Re: God dammit

Post by Zer0 » Tue Jan 22, 2013 6:32 pm

MATPOC wrote:FUCK YOU!

It's snowing here, have not had a proper ride in over a week, and before that it was a WHOLE MONTH!

so stop whining and get wrenching, can't be that hard to fix the HD, you got a hammer, right?
That reminds me: listen you Slavic fuck, you deserve a megaton of fuck yous for every Russian fucking Thistle that rolls in my path and explodes into a fury of little ass russki thorns that find their way in my helmet and down my shirt. Plus, like every year, I'm gonna have to start picking the bastards out of my back
Yard, so fuck you and your distant relative responsible for bringing this nasty scourge to this country.

Hammer. OK, you got me; that was damn funny, but you're still more than welcome to fuck off for all that tumbleweed bullshit.

@ Hank: so steal one fer crissakes. Then you can tell us all what it really feels like to ride it like it's stolen. Duh.
'74 R90/6--Thor
'05 Sportster 1200--FrankenRat
My boy D when he was 4 wrote:Bones aren't important--we like motorcycles.
High Kommand wrote:That's the problem with giving a bike a girl's name. Too much temptation to lay it down to examine the undercarriage...

User avatar
MATPOC
The Unreasonable Ukranian
Location: Providence, RI

Re: God dammit

Post by MATPOC » Wed Jan 23, 2013 6:45 am

I have no fucking idea what a fucking Titsle is and how am I fucking responsible for it being a fucking thorn in your fucking side, all I know it's minus fucking 12ºC this morning (whatever it is in Fahrenheit, 12ºF?) and I can't ride my new toy, so I'm extra fucking cranky, plus I'm busy and stressed at work, which isn't a bad thing in the middle of the winter. My wifey tell me it's -19ºC (just below 0ºF) in her home town, may drop to -40ºC (same as -40ºF, I know that for sure) it may as well be -190, I have no idea how people survive this shit! Coldest weather I had ever experienced was one of those times when it dropped to 0ºF (-18ºC) and I was stupid enough to go for a "Cold Weather Challenge" ride with Pattio. Helmet visor iced up, Pattios throttle froze (I tried riding his bike and dumped it) tire grip was nil and I was happy it was over when after riding 10 miles we took a photo in front of the bank thermometer and returned to the shop for some hot beverages. We did not win the challenge since every year some fuckers from Minnesota or some other forsaken place take it home with -10ºF because it was the warmest day for them to ride and we had to wait till midnight for it to drop to 0ºF

Point being, I have no fucking control over this shit, just like my marriage, but I can fix the bike! So grab that hammer and show that Iron Beast who's the boss! (Wish it worked with wiminz type)

And Hank, you are welcome to any of my bikes, only problem is that 1500-2000 mile trip you have to take.... wish you all were a little closer.

User avatar
Jaeger
Baron von Scrapple
Location: NoVA
Contact:

Re: God dammit

Post by Jaeger » Wed Jan 23, 2013 7:46 am

Girls, com'on now, it's ok, you're both pretty. Now take your meds and play nice.

Image

--Jaeger
Bigshankhank wrote:The world is a fucking wreck, but there is still sunshine in some places. Go outside and look for it.
<<NON ERRO>>
2018 Indian Scout -- "Lilah"

User avatar
DerGolgo
Zaphod's Zeitgeist
Location: Potato

Re: God dammit

Post by DerGolgo » Wed Jan 23, 2013 8:40 am

Ah! Those are the sounds of winter, I knew something had been missing this year...
If there were absolutely anything to be afraid of, don't you think I would have worn pants?

I said I have a big stick.

Zer0
Professor of Poop
Location: Smoggy Valley--east of Smog City

Re: God dammit

Post by Zer0 » Wed Jan 23, 2013 11:17 am

Jaeger wrote:Girls, com'on now, it's ok, you're both pretty.
Omigod! Jaeger totally just said I'm pretty!!!!!!!!

Omigod!
Omigod!
Omigod!
Omigod!
Omigod!

Oh, and someone give Matpoc a hug. He's cold. (Wait, I thought cold = warm for Russkis? Or maybe he's really a closet Californian. :D )
'74 R90/6--Thor
'05 Sportster 1200--FrankenRat
My boy D when he was 4 wrote:Bones aren't important--we like motorcycles.
High Kommand wrote:That's the problem with giving a bike a girl's name. Too much temptation to lay it down to examine the undercarriage...

User avatar
MATPOC
The Unreasonable Ukranian
Location: Providence, RI

Re: God dammit

Post by MATPOC » Wed Jan 23, 2013 6:30 pm

To be honest I'm not really a Russkiy, just a jew-boy form Ukraine, don't think my people had come from Egypt anyway, more likely some Greek/Roman/Turkish/Tatar settlers that accepted Judaism long time ago while Russia was nothing more than couple villages around Kiev and it was known as Kiev's Russia, kind of odd since Kiev now is capitol of Ukraine... anyway, born and raised in Odessa, not the same one Hank was talking about, it's a 200 year old city built in the place of a Tatar settlement after Russian Empire took the land from Ottoman Empire (Turks) in some war in 1790's, and they quickly built the port which became a free port (porto franco as we know it) with a population larger than entire state of Rhode Island it's a 5th largest city in Ukraine but at one time it was 4th largest city in Russia, still is largest southern seaport in what is now known as Ukraine and also one of the summer vacation destinations, if Crimea is like Florida than we are Virgina Beach, warm in the summer, not so cold in the winter but it does snow. This may explain why I don't like cold, never liked cold and never want to be cold... I know it's warm in Florida but it's the worst fucking place for riding, all my friends who moved there sold their bikes. I like the coast and only place that I really liked so far was San Francisco but there is no fucking way I can afford that so North East it is... at least I get to ride most of the year, no one wants to take away my 2 strokes and no fucking earthquakes!

12ci
Ayatollah of Mayhem
Location: Rive Gauche Anacostia

Re: God dammit

Post by 12ci » Wed Jan 23, 2013 8:06 pm

he must be upset: his spelling is near pperfect....
Zer0 wrote:All you pudpulllers might be wondering why my recent postings arre becoming more vitriolic. Both bikes are down and this is the eighth day I've had to drive to work.

The Sporty's been stuck in 2nd ggear and I haven't had the tiime to loook into it. And now the Beemer's clutch went out, and all the parts and all won't be in tilll later this week--meaning I'm driving to work for a total of two plus consecutive weeks at least.

FUCK!

So if I've offended anyone's delicate sensibilities, I have some simple advice for you: now's an outstanding time to unwad your panties and get over it.
today you decide what tomorrow will bring

User avatar
Jaeger
Baron von Scrapple
Location: NoVA
Contact:

Re: God dammit

Post by Jaeger » Wed Jan 23, 2013 8:23 pm

12ci wrote:he must be upset: his spelling is near pperfect....
:lol: :lol: :lol:

--Jaeger
Bigshankhank wrote:The world is a fucking wreck, but there is still sunshine in some places. Go outside and look for it.
<<NON ERRO>>
2018 Indian Scout -- "Lilah"

Zer0
Professor of Poop
Location: Smoggy Valley--east of Smog City

Re: God dammit

Post by Zer0 » Wed Jan 23, 2013 9:55 pm

:P It's because I wrote that on my Ipod--a lot harder to type sloppily, and the keys don't mess with me the way they do on a regular keyboard--especially the one at work, which causes single letters to sometimes double, and double ones to triple. I'm writing this from my desktop at home, which works great.

Beemer should be fixed Sat, which rules because my mellow is all but tapped: not only am I bikeless, but I'm down to only 2 beers in the fridge, and not even a gram of bud. It's like I have male PMS. If it can get worse, it probably will either mañana or übermañana. Stay tuned. Watch for earthquake or freeway collapse news, and my name will likely be mentioned in the first line. Just sayin.
'74 R90/6--Thor
'05 Sportster 1200--FrankenRat
My boy D when he was 4 wrote:Bones aren't important--we like motorcycles.
High Kommand wrote:That's the problem with giving a bike a girl's name. Too much temptation to lay it down to examine the undercarriage...

User avatar
Bigshankhank
Fully Autonomous Cock-Puncher
Location: Exiled to Living in a Van Down By The River
Contact:

Re: God dammit

Post by Bigshankhank » Thu Jan 24, 2013 3:10 am

Image
It's time for Humankind to ditch the imaginary friends of our species' childhood and grow the fuck up.
-Davros

"Lasse mich deine Seele dem Herrscher der Finsternis opfern"

Let me sacrifice your soul to the ruler of darkness

Always carry a bottle of whiskey when you travel in case of a snakebite. Futhermore, always carry a small snake.

Zer0
Professor of Poop
Location: Smoggy Valley--east of Smog City

Re: God dammit

Post by Zer0 » Thu Jan 24, 2013 9:26 am

/´¯/)
/¯../
/..../
/´¯/'...'/´¯¯`•¸
/'/.../..../...../¨¯\
('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...')
\ /
\ _.•´
\ (
\ \
'74 R90/6--Thor
'05 Sportster 1200--FrankenRat
My boy D when he was 4 wrote:Bones aren't important--we like motorcycles.
High Kommand wrote:That's the problem with giving a bike a girl's name. Too much temptation to lay it down to examine the undercarriage...

User avatar
Bigshankhank
Fully Autonomous Cock-Puncher
Location: Exiled to Living in a Van Down By The River
Contact:

Re: God dammit

Post by Bigshankhank » Thu Jan 24, 2013 10:16 am

Zer0 wrote:/´¯/)
/¯../
/..../
/´¯/'...'/´¯¯`•¸
/'/.../..../...../¨¯\
('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...')
\ /
\ _.•´
\ (
\ \
Your ASCII is weak, but opening it as a quote shows me what you meant
It's time for Humankind to ditch the imaginary friends of our species' childhood and grow the fuck up.
-Davros

"Lasse mich deine Seele dem Herrscher der Finsternis opfern"

Let me sacrifice your soul to the ruler of darkness

Always carry a bottle of whiskey when you travel in case of a snakebite. Futhermore, always carry a small snake.

Zer0
Professor of Poop
Location: Smoggy Valley--east of Smog City

Re: God dammit

Post by Zer0 » Thu Jan 24, 2013 11:37 am

Goddammit, that's not what it loooked like when I copied and pasted. Fucking ASCII or whatever it's callled.

(seriously, I love you all. Usually)
'74 R90/6--Thor
'05 Sportster 1200--FrankenRat
My boy D when he was 4 wrote:Bones aren't important--we like motorcycles.
High Kommand wrote:That's the problem with giving a bike a girl's name. Too much temptation to lay it down to examine the undercarriage...

goose
Pâté de Foie Gras
Location: Foggy Peninsula West of Oakland and South of Marin

Re: God dammit

Post by goose » Thu Jan 24, 2013 3:12 pm

Solutions abound:

You can come up to Norcal and steal my bike. Matpoc gets better weather and Zero gets a bike that has slightly more than 2 gears. Win win baby.
Drink triples til you're seeing double, feeling single, and looking for trouble! -Johnny Nitro, RIP

"British bikes of that era are made of a special alloy known as Brittainium. It is the only metal known to be able to rust even when fully submerged in oil. It also corrodes microscopic passages through itself whenever it makes contact with any known gasketing material." - AZ Rider

Re: Husaberg Build: "I pictured it more like the heroin addicted ex that keeps turning up, the bleeding you dry, breaking your heart, and crushing your soul, but you keep taking her back because it's the most fun ride you've ever had..." Bo-9

User avatar
MATPOC
The Unreasonable Ukranian
Location: Providence, RI

Re: God dammit

Post by MATPOC » Fri Jan 25, 2013 6:33 am

you have enough room on your couch?

User avatar
Bigshankhank
Fully Autonomous Cock-Puncher
Location: Exiled to Living in a Van Down By The River
Contact:

Re: God dammit

Post by Bigshankhank » Fri Jan 25, 2013 11:40 am

goose wrote:Solutions abound:

You can come up to Norcal and steal my bike.
Its been done so often, its almost a cliche'...
It's time for Humankind to ditch the imaginary friends of our species' childhood and grow the fuck up.
-Davros

"Lasse mich deine Seele dem Herrscher der Finsternis opfern"

Let me sacrifice your soul to the ruler of darkness

Always carry a bottle of whiskey when you travel in case of a snakebite. Futhermore, always carry a small snake.

Zer0
Professor of Poop
Location: Smoggy Valley--east of Smog City

Re: God dammit

Post by Zer0 » Mon Feb 11, 2013 10:41 am

All better now. Some misfiring on the BeeEm--will have to study up on, then adjust points, but have been riding to work two weeks now. Blue skies over SoCal once again-- low 60s.

Thank you for all the comforting words. Carry on.
'74 R90/6--Thor
'05 Sportster 1200--FrankenRat
My boy D when he was 4 wrote:Bones aren't important--we like motorcycles.
High Kommand wrote:That's the problem with giving a bike a girl's name. Too much temptation to lay it down to examine the undercarriage...

goose
Pâté de Foie Gras
Location: Foggy Peninsula West of Oakland and South of Marin

Re: God dammit

Post by goose » Mon Feb 11, 2013 1:39 pm

Bigshankhank wrote:
goose wrote:Solutions abound:

You can come up to Norcal and steal my bike.
Its been done so often, its almost a cliche'...
OUCH! True, but ouch anyway!
Drink triples til you're seeing double, feeling single, and looking for trouble! -Johnny Nitro, RIP

"British bikes of that era are made of a special alloy known as Brittainium. It is the only metal known to be able to rust even when fully submerged in oil. It also corrodes microscopic passages through itself whenever it makes contact with any known gasketing material." - AZ Rider

Re: Husaberg Build: "I pictured it more like the heroin addicted ex that keeps turning up, the bleeding you dry, breaking your heart, and crushing your soul, but you keep taking her back because it's the most fun ride you've ever had..." Bo-9

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